An Organized Force...

"It's horrible!," Perry exclaimed. "The Wizard's evil forces have come alive and are terrorizing our friends! We need your help Mr. Lucas!"

With all of the animals completely freaked out, I had no choice but to keep things calm.

"Just, everyone, hold on a minute here," I said. "Where has the Wizard's army struck and what are they doing?"

"Near the patio furniture section and the fishing department," Perry answered.

Before I could contain him, he bagan to tell a horrible story. Some of the possessed animals were terrorizing zebras and the water buffalo (or whatever those fat things near the water were).

It seemed that the lions and the crocodiles were among the worst. The ravens, sparrows and parrots were also bad. But, I quickly found out that they were not possessed or evil, they were just 'dropping bombs' to be funny. It wasn't funny. Especially at the restaurant.
After Perry's fantastical tales, I knew we must act. The animals needed to work together to defeat the evil Wizard and his few possessed animals. That's why I enlisted some of the brilliant ideas I learned from my dad...

"First off," I told Moose and Perry, "We must get all of the animals to work together, use their own special skills so we can defeat this evil wizard, Dick Cheney. Start with Kermit, the Prairie Dog activist," I demanded. Kermit is widely known for his poetic and energetic rally speeches.

And this speech was no exeption - Kermit the Prairie Dog is a magical speeching animal.

"Prairie Dogs, ground hogs, cattle, goats, wild piggies!" He cried. "Gather 'round and unite! I know you are saying, 'Kermit - I've been unfrozen, I am sore. I cannot move about this store.' Friends, being frozen by an evil wizard and then being placed in a department store would be difficult for anyone. But, trouble is afoot. And we need your help.

I wish to welcome him - the chosen one. Our roly-poly, chubby-wubby, cutesy-wootsey, giggly-wiggly friend Lucas is with us!"

On and on Kermit spoke. He built the crowd of animals up to fury....or is that furry? Then, he introduced me and moose brought me up to the mound.

"Which side are you on!?," I asked the crowd.

"On my left side!" yelled moose from behind me.

I whispered to moose that I was kinda talking to the others. And, besides, I didn't think it was appropriate for him to be laying down while I was giving my big speech.

"Who's side!?...... we are on the side of good! The side of cotton candy and happiness and little kids like me! Look at what we have available to us. An entire store full of treats and ammenities. More than enough food for all of us. Plenty of places to sleep and stay warm. Why, even the fish have a nice quiet tank to relax in. But why don't we share these things?"

"My friends, in each one of us there is a desire to help our friends. We want to meet new friends too. But, there are those who are purely evil who wish to scare us into submission. They want to break our instincts of unity. And they do it through fear. I've heard they used to do it through a color coded alert system, but my dad says they won't bring that back until the election season.

Anyway, the crocodiles and lions are not evil. They are possessed by he who is evil! The evil wizard! And WE MUST FIGHT THE WIZARD HERE SO WE DO NOT HAVE TO FIGHT HIM AT HOME!" (that last part really scared those animals I think).

Upon my order, Perry moved the threat level to 'MAGENTA.'